19th March 2013 - Tuesday
I haven't been blogging for more than a year, tumblr and twitter still active. I came to blog to share a story of my dog, I wanna post it so in the future, I'll take a look at my post and recap everything. This is memories..
Everyone know that I've a dog..
Name: Princess Tinkle Bell Lim Doggy
Respond to: Doggy
Colour: Black
Breed: Chihuahua
Size: Small and obese
Yes, she bite.
If I'm not wrong, at year 1999 which I'm primary 2? During June, my sister wanted a dog for her birthday and as you know, what we want, my dad will get it for us. So we went to a few places to hunt for dogs and we ended up at one of the shop at Serangoon gardens which is now replace by some car repair shop. I remember we bought this dog cause it's small size and it's pure black in colour. We were young thus we didn't know what breed is it. But it's a Chihuahua, but looking at her photos, I doubt her breed now. Haha and I guess when we bought her, she was like a year old? The cost of her was $800, plus cage and everything up to $1000? Oh, and how her name come from? Why so long? We actually called her princess, but she didn't respond to that. My uncle said call her tinkle bell instead, cause her collar have a bell and she walk around with the bell sound. So we added tinkle bell into princess which became Princess Tinkle Bell and out surname was Lim. So is Princess Tinkle Bell Lim and after a while we realize she respond to Doggy. And so, from there on we call her Doggy. Thus, full name, Princess Tinkle Bell Lim Doggy.
This 2 photo above, if I'm not wrong it should be her 1st photo. She look so ugly, prefer her current look. Haha, she's so black! Yeah, she've a collar with her license plate. In the past, when technology wasn't that great, license have to be shown if not will be capture. But now, license turn into micro-chip and was insert into her neck. I remember when I saw the vet or don't know who injected the micro-chip in her, I tear down cause I feel that it's hurting her. It bleed a little though. We were young so we did not train her to sit, fetch, toilet train, row and everything. So she is no different from a fat, lazy, stupid, useless and spoilt dog. We spoil and pampered her terribly. She is rather smart, cause she understand English, Chinese, dialect and a little of Malay language. My grandmother is the only one that taught her how to shake hand and toilet train her. And my dog only shake hand with her and never once us. My grandmother used to cane her and she'll always run to us cause she know we'll protect her. I'll always hug her tight to prevent her from getting hit from my grandmother. She'll always attack the cane fiercely. I wonder why my dog so unfriendly, no one can touch her cause she bite and bark. Whenever people come, she'll bark and I'll always have to keep her in cage. But her barking let me know that someone came. There's 3 thing that you shouldn't do to my dog. 1st) Do not touch her, 2nd) Do not look at her in the eye and 3rd) Do not point her, if not she'll bite and bark at you and mark you for life. Haha. Oh, and I remember her hiding from us and will ended up at the bottom of the sofa. And when we changed the sofa, she got used to squeezing in. And the new sofa, didn't have a big gap at the bottom and she couldn't squeeze in anymore! Mad cute, cause she is very very very fat. And also I remember, every time she got locked in cage. When we are about to release her from there, we will always find a place to hide and shout to my maid 'Put the dog out!' and my dog will come running like a mad dog, galloping around the house finding us. When she couldn't find us, we will shout her name and she'll follow the voice. The look on her face of turning right and left, feeling confuse is so cute. When she found us, she'll turn around like mad feeling very very ha ppy! oh god, I miss that so much. Feel like hugging her now. She make me feel like a kid again. We'll always play catching together. Chasing her to the kitchen and she will chase me back to my room. Oh! And I remember the very first time I carry her to the mirror to look at her ugly self, and she was like who is it? And wanna attack it, hahaha dumb.
I've lost all her photo due to phone crash, this are all the photos that I could find. Photo taken with spongebob! She hate to take photo! Whenever we want to take a snap shot of her, she'll bark and run off! This is a retarded photo, she look dumb but at least she looked at me! Look at how fat she is for a chihuahua! It's like you couldn't even see her neck! Hahaha this makes me laugh! And I remember there's one time she had problem in walking, brought her to the vet to take a look. And as you know, she bite thus the doctor have to muzzle her mouth. I hate people that mizzel my dog's mouth, I feel they are hurting her. I'll get angry and sad and tear down and tell them to stop it. And will hold her mouth instead. The doctor said that she have problem in walking us cause by 3 reasons, 1st) born to have leg problem but symptoms come late. 2) she is old and 3rd) she is too heavy to hold her weight. Hahaha and doctor declare she have obese! A chihuahua weighs more than 6kg, I used to carry her till my arms couldn't take it.
Love to see the way she sleep, look at her cuddling herself to sleep on her expensive bed that cost $90! And look at the amount of toys she have. We gave her 2 small towel so she can use it when she's feeling warm. And my sister even made her a small pillow! Whenever she sleep soundly, she'll make noises and also her stomach will make weird noises too. Could it be having nightmare? Hmm, what could a dog dream of?
Remember Lost & found? Yeah, the hamster that I found outside my corridor. Bought it in and raise it, and my dog thinks it's something new and keep disturbing the hamster! Mad cute, look at the way they look at each other eye to eye! It's like 'what are you?' AHHH CUTE.
Greedy dog always wait below the dining table, waiting for me to feed her some of what I'm eating. Don't she know how fat she is?
Another sleeping photo.
This was taken not long, I remember that period of time she was like so weird. She tail was down, she was very unhappy and sticky to us. She kept following us everywhere we go in the house. My huge eeyore are on the ground and it's the very first time she hide there and sleep. And I carried her up my bed, she went to a corner where it's full of soft toys and just sleep like that. It's damn damn weird and it never happen before. I almost thought she was dying and she knew it so she kept sticking to us!
Her virgin trip to the beach and park! Brought her to east coast park on one of the Sundays with milk milk (Desmond's dog)! It's her first time there, she's so scared! Too many dogs there, but i'm glad I brought her there if not she won't even know what a beach looks like! Milk milk keep smell her butt, doggy did not attempt to bite her but she was so scared! She's always this way, at home like a princess, when she's out, scared like a coward. Haha, cannot tolerate her. It's okay la, cause I rarely bring her out. She didn't see much of dogs and cats only our neighbor's dog thus she is afraid. But even our neighbor's dog, she is afraid! Even though they met everyday and barking to communicate in my house. But outside face to face, she'll run away. First time stepping on sands, something new for her.
Once a month or twice, my maid will take her bed to wash and she got to lie on a cloth without any toys to play. She'll always drag and rearrange to her comfortable way. Drag here and there.
And I remember when she was new in our family and I was young, I brought her down for a walk and a kid was telling her mum ' Mummy look! A cat! ' and I was like, ' Hello? I leash her up and does she look like a cat? ' LOL. Always like to lie on top of everything, clothes, cloth, newspaper and even bags! Sit on top of it, blocking the path way. Whenever she see's newspaper, she will scratch it till it torn apart.
Haha, hoodie sweater from Desmond! It's too small for his dog, thus gave me. But my dog is too fat to fit in! And I remember she have a hoodie top too (I love bone) and I always will cover her head and eyes with that and she walk around with it and couldn't see a thing! And end up banging the wall or the leg of the chairs! We will always laugh at her stupid-ness. And also whenever my maid mop finish the floor, the floor is still wet and slippery and just nice we let the dog out, she will dash and slip and slide!
Bought this new cage fence on year 2012 reunion day, just a day before Chinese new year. She was rather happy and loving this cause it's not like her old cage, small and enclosed. At least this is just fence without ceiling. Every time, no matter what when people came to our house she will bark non-stop. Especially during Chinese new year where more than 30 relatives will come over. The barking never stops, but in year 2012, it was amazing and shock, she was kept in the 'cage' and she didn't even bark a bit! We was like, are you serious? I'm glad she like it. (I think)
Photos of her that I shot are always with tongue sticking out, I've no idea why. Could it be I'm always eating? And she's on my tummy.
Bed washing again. See see, I don't know how she drag her 'bed' so far with all the toys on top.
Her favorite spot to pee, carpet. Whenever she sees a carpet especially outside toilet, she'll just pee there. And we always have to ask the maid to change the carpet and mop. A day, could change around 6 times or maybe more of the carpet. And she always will run to my parent's room's carpet to pee! My parent will always go crazy and chase her out. Haha, cause the smell will lingers.
She really can eat, she eat seriously more than a human. She eat everything! Love letter, fish slices snacks, durian, every single shit! Even what I don't eat she'll also eat!
This must have taken during Chinese new year too, cause there's a big carpet placed in the living room. I can see from the photo that I just bathed her and she's like so happy running around like crazy and wiping herself whenever she see's a cloth. And I'm the only one that can bathe her in the whole world! I remember when I've to inform the maid the bring her towel over cause she got to bathe. She'll understand! So we always use different language every time when I'm about to bathe her! Words like, bathe, pom pom, or make sounds. But no matter what she'll understand and run away, she hate to bathe! She will bite or attack us whenever we are gonna bathe her. But to everyone's surprise, we don't understand why she only allow me to bathe her! It is cause I wash her up very very fast like only a minute? Haha, my sister was so afraid to even touch her! I remember I was gone for a month and my sister don't even dare to bathe her cause doggy attack her. My dad even have to buy a dog brush for her to use it on doggy. But ended up that thing only use 1 time. I love the way she only let me bathe her but it's troublesome cause no matter what I've to bathe her! And cause of this actually my sister and I spilt the chores. I'll do the bathing and she'll do the cutting of her nails! But it's unfair! Cause for 14 years my dog's nails did not cut! She'll bite my sister whenever she's about to cut. BOOHOO. Can't forget the moment I bathe her finish, I open the toilet door and she will dash out and find every cloth and wipe herself. Running the whole house like crazy for at least an hour. My sister will know she bathe cause her fur will be very very messy and my dad will know cause the toilet will be full of her fur.
During reunion dinner, we will always eat steamboat. We will always throw in some chicken and when it's cooked, we will always prepare a bowl of rice and mix the chicken in together for my dog! We will always eat together like a family cause we are a family!
Her old cage at the back.
Bed plus toys plus her equal to sleeping.
Bloody hell, step on all my branded bags.
Look at her nails, though you don't see it's long but you should hear her foot steps. It's like from far you an hear it and you'll know it's her. Really happy to hear the steps, cause you'll know if she's in the house or where. Whenever we call out her name, you can hear her steps walking to us. If you shout mummumm (food), her steps will be quick!
Wonder why some of her photos doesn't look like her. This photo is cute cause you can see her head shape. I always like to use my palm to cover her whole head cause it's small. Haha.
This must be taken when I'm on the toilet bowl, she will always always accompany us to the toilet. Either wait outside, guard the toilet door while we bathe or wait inside, sitting down or walking around finding for water. She like to smell our poop. The toilet can be so so crowded till my mum, sister, me and doggy in one toilet. And doggy will end up walking around sniffing here and there and mummy will always say her, so crowded still come in squeeze and walk around! How adorable?
See see! Like to lie on top of anything! Even my pants, still play around.
I Seriously wonder how she drag under the chair and on the carpet.
'Don't throw me alone' Whenever we are on the sofa, she'll join us. When we leave the sofa, she'll always leave. When we play with her on the sofa, she'll just keep turning round and round and round like a crazy dog. Wait, she is crazy.
'Please give me food.'
'Don't disturb me sleeping if not....'
'I'll pop my eyes out'
She loves the sun, whenever there's sunlight she'll run to it and sit there for the whole day till the sun is gone! Look at her shiok face while tanning! She's black, and black absorb heat! How can she tolerate the heat!
*Wink*
She was still fine the night before the incident, she was still lying in-between my leg! And the next day, 12 March 2012, when I came back home around 1am..... I saw this.. (I don't wanna continue typing..)
I was worried sick, when I come home with this. Cause earlier, on Sunday I came home with the same scene too. But we didn't bring her to the vet because we thought it was just indigestion. And so, it's the 2nd time of the week and I decided to bring her to 24 hours vet in the middle of the night. Called for help and drove over there. She doesn't even have the strength at all. She don't even wanna move, walk or even bark. I've to carry her up from her bed. She tried to climb up a pavement but she fall. We brought her to Mount Pleasant Animal Hospital at Whitley road.
Don't know what happen to her right eye, full of eye dirt. I thought it was some kind of sickness.
We waited for a while, I let her down for a walk. I told her to follow me out of the door. It's two glass panel side by side, and I opened the right side. She walk to the left and bang into the door. It was cute though but I was so afraid, cause she doesn't seems like she could see. When she was young, she bang here and there, fall here and there, it was cute and funny. But for now, whenever she fall, we feel like crying.
Her fur drop like mad. One pat and millions of fur drop down. Sigh
On the table and was talking to the doctor, she was so scared that she shiver badly. Did blood test for her on the spot and results were up in 30minutes time. Her red blood cells is fine, but her white blood... From the results, suspect there is kidney and heart problem. Doctor said to do further test and to confirm (Urine and ultrasound), she have to stay one night and put on drip. I control my tears, I can't cry in-front of them. So I settle the deposit of $1000 and went to her cage to talk to her.
I can't help it and I tear down. I said ' Doggy, be strong okay. Don't scared, later I'll come over for you '
I didn't sleep much after sending her to hospital, I came home at about 5am. Was so worried and attend work without much sleep. Cried for the whole night and day even in office. Called the hospital in the morning and asked about doggy. They said that she wasn't doing well. She don't wanna eat nor drink. Ultrasound will be done only in the evening. I tear down after hearing this. Went over after work as it's near my work place. Met my dad, mum and sister there but they have not reach yet. So I went to visit her first. Seeing her in this state, I kept crying. Nurse told me she doesn't want to eat but she wanna eat people's finger. It's good thing that her fierce-ness is still there. No one dare to even touch her! And so they arrive and I brought them into the room, my sister begin to cry too.
Heart aches to see her on drip.
She's the smallest there and it's a Chihuahua. So many big dogs and only this smallest dog bite!
So, I told the nurse to bring her water and food to us. Cause if we're there maybe she could eat. But, she doesn't even want to eat a bit at all. Just one night and her weight drop. I don't know but look at her size!
When we are about to leave, we put her back into the cage and place water and food and towel in there. And finally, she drank.
Did ultrasound, looked through the photos. Her kidney was left with nothing, I couldn't even see any 'bean' shape at all. Doctor talked to me, she said doggy kidney is left with around 20% that is working. She was diagnose with heart murmur, kidney failure, kidney infections and kidney stones. So I asked, ' How long more can she live? ' Her reply tear our heart apart ' We're only looking at days to weeks here ' And said to discharge her tomorrow to spend some time with her.
I didn't attend work the next day, I'm gonna pick her up. Was so happy that she could come home. Sad thing, she got to put on drip at home. Doctor told me how to 'poke' into her skin, I can't do it. I really can't. Poke into her neck and drip her everyday? Seriously?
Look at her fur, she drop way way way too much!
Was settling her bill, her medical bill for 2 nights cost us $1500. Horrible or what. But it's worth it, for 14 years meaning 1 year for $100.
Let's go home!
Since I know she only have a few days to live on and she doesn't want to eat, so I went to compass to get her some bak kwa which are her favorites. Bought 350g of it, brought it home for her. End up ahma also eat.
Her medicines, her diet and her drip.
She couldn't walk, she doesn't have the strength to walk anymore. Walking to toilet seems so hard and tiring for her. She walked and stop and lie flat on the ground. I always found her in the toilet. lying down, couldn't even move a bit. Every morning, she'll wait outside for me. She just somehow know when I'll be awake and always waiting for me outside my room's door. Sitting there, waiting. Always, I opened the door I'll see her happily waggling her tail, jumping around and followed me everywhere. To toilet, to kitchen, waiting for me to prepare, waiting for me to bathe till I'm out of house. Always waiting for me to gave her some of my breakfast, but this time round. She did not follow me, I couldn't find her. She was found in the toilet lying there, I cried. I've to carry her back to the bed, the toilet floor was so wet.
She can't even arrange her own position to sleep, she just sleep so awkwardly. suffocating.
On 14th March 201, Thursday, I was at work and talked to my sister. We decided, to put her to sleep. She's suffering, we couldn't let her go. But we have no choice, we have to. It's time to ease her pain. We couldn't stop crying. I'm sorry doggy..
Dylan and Kelvin came by to see doggy, though they didn't met her at all. She didn't bite, she didn't bark, she couldn't even bother even if strangers touches or carry her. She just lie on the bench, her eyes couldn't open anymore. She doesn't respond to us. Look at how thin she in. 4 days of not eating nor drinking, not even her favorite bak kwa.
At 430pm, we carried her to the car. Brought along some of her toys, her favorite biscuit and towel. We hope these will accompany her, let her bring it along with her.
The last touch..
The last time she'll be lying on my lap..
Waited for Sylvester to arrive, and doggy was brought in to insert a tube on her arms..
The last moment with her, doctor gave us some time to speak with her. Asked if we want to witness the scene, I said yes. Cause I wanna be with her even if it's her last moment. It's so hard for me, even typing this post is hurting me. I can't help to tear down whenever I recall.
14 March 2013, 5.55pm, she's gone, she left us, she left me, she left my family, she left the world. The doctor inject in, within seconds, I saw her breathing stop. Her eyes were open, our tears flow down like waterfall. And she's gone, forever.. I could never touch her again, I could never kiss her, smell her, bathe her, carry her or anything anymore. I even miss her urine on the carpet.
Her death certificate.
And the next day, I went down, I printed her photo and laminate it. I place this over there as her photo to be in memory of. I bought food for her, but her ashes weren't there yet. So I just put it there for every dog to share.
This photo was taken during 2013 Chinese new year, and it's the last new year we spend together. And during the 7th day of your death which is 20th March, I waited at home for you to com back. I couldn't hear you nor smell you. I thought you'll be home cause Chinese says on the 7th day of the death, the dead will come home. Or are you lost? you must be so scared. Do not be a dog again in your next life. Even my neighbor's dog waited outside my house, waited for her to come over. I tear after seeing it.
It took me so long and so hard to find this video. It's extinct, I find and find but no where to be found. Lucky and thank god. I send to someone and someone found it. I was so happy to see this video again. It means a lot a lot to me. I'll cherish this video. See, everything also want eat!
Doggy, I love you so much you know? Please be in peace and forgive us for putting you to sleep. You server us well for the past 14 years though you did nothing. But nothing is already the best for us. Every morning, every time I come home or wake up, I looked at your bed and cry. Your bed is empty, I don't hear your foot steps, I don't see you anymore. You aren't here for me anymore. You'll never be replaced, you'll always be in our hearts. I love you doggy.
Rest in peace, 1999 - 14 March 2013. You stupid fat dog.
